“Intuitive Eating” Challenge the Food Police
I got out my copy of Intuitive Eating so that I could write this blog today and realized that I would be repeating some of what I said in my previous post. But that’s OK, I think that “food police” and guilt about food and eating are so common among people working on achieving a healthier weight that it’s worth repeating and clarifying. So what do Tribole and Resch say about Challenging the Food Police?
“Scream a loud ‘No’ to thoughts in your head that declare you’re ‘good’ for eating under 1,000 calories or ‘bad’ because you ate a piece of chocolate cake. The Food Police monitor the unreasonable rules that dieting has created. The police station is housed deep in your psyche and its loudspeaker shouts negative barbs, hopeless phrases, and guilt-provoking indictments. Chasing the Food Police away is a critical step in returning to Intuitive Eating.” (pg. 92, Intuitive Eating)
From my day-to-day interactions with clients, I know that people are riddled with guilt about how they eat, but according to Tribole and Resch, “In a random survey of 2,075 adults, 45% said they feel guilty after eating foods they like!” (pg. 92) How is it that food has been equated with “badness” or “goodness”? Is it the Puritan values that our country drew from and was built upon? Other countries don’t seem to have this same “guilt” issue about food. In fact, when Americans are asked to think of the first word that comes to mind when they hear the words, “chocolate cake” they say, “guilt.” The French think, “celebration.” We keep trying to figure out the “French paradox.” I suspect a huge part of it is simply perception and being “allowed” to enjoy food and celebrate it. We’ve heard of people being punished by having supper withheld and we think of a meal of “bread and water” as being punishment for bad behavior. Whatever the reasons that our culture tends to equate food, or enjoying food, or delicious food with guilt, it’s time to fight back and take a different approach to food and eating.
How can you start to take a different approach to food and eating? First, become aware of your instant self-talk when it comes to food. I am going to list some common misperceptions, THESE ARE NOT ACCURATE, but they’re common and I want you to see if you say some of this to yourself.
–Fat is bad
–Carbohydrates are bad
–It’s bad to eat after 6:00 pm
–Eggs are bad
–Ice cream is bad
–All of the things that I like to eat are bad
What other self-talk do you have about food? It may feel real, you may believe it with all your heart and soul, but remember, simply because you think something is true doesn’t make it so. The book explains it clearly, “The thoughts themselves can be very damaging and can affect subsequent behavior. These thoughts are called cognitive distortions, and we call the voices that speak these distortions the Food Police.” (pg. 95)
Let’s talk about the Food Police. I can’t say it better than the authors so I’ll quote, “[The Food Police] is your inner judge and jury that determines if you are doing ‘good’ or ‘bad.’ The Food Police is the sum of all your dieting and food rules, and gets stronger with each diet. It also gets strengthened through new food rules that you may read about in magazines or messages you hear from friends and family.” (pg. 96) The Food Police doesn’t help you, it merely makes you feel bad. It tells you that “you can’t possibly be hungry, you just ate breakfast,” or, “I can’t believe you just ate two pieces of bread/a piece of chocolate/guacamole/peanut butter, you’re going to get so fat from that!”
To get the Food Police to SHUT UP, you must challenge that voice inside your head. You must say, “I know what hungry feels like, and even though I just ate breakfast, I am hungry now,” or, “Avocados are good for me, taste delicious and make me feel satisfied,” or, “Chocolate isn’t going to make me fat; one food doesn’t have the power to make or break my health.”
Who else works with the Food Police? The Nutrition Informant, or as I like to refer to the voice, the Tattletale. It says it’s looking out for your health, but it’s just tallying all of your “sins.” It’s the voice that says, “If you want a snack, it should only be fruits or vegetables.” The Nutrition Informant is tricky because most of us DO want to eat a healthy diet so it seems silly that we’d want to fight against that good advice. But is it good advice? When it comes to having an apple as a snack, that’s OK, right? Sure, but know that a 75 calorie snack is going to put a little something in your belly, but you’ll probably be hungry again soon. The Nutrition Informant insists that “you can’t possibly be hungry after eating that apple for a snack.” The Nutrition Informant doesn’t tell you that a peanut butter sandwich or cheese and crackers or some bean dip with crackers are all healthy foods too, and they’ll actually satisfy you.
What can you do to fight the Nutrition Informant? Turn it into the Nutrition Ally. This voice has no hidden agenda and says, “I like low fat sour cream just as much as regular fat sour cream. I think I’ll pick the one with less saturated fat.” When the Nutrition Ally speaks, you don’t feel bad or guilty, you feel like you’re in charge.
What other voices are floating around in there? There’s the Diet Rebel. You know that voice, it’s the two year old in your dieting head screaming, “You can’t make me!” It’s the voice that says, “I’m not going to eat ‘healthy’ fish, I’m going to eat deep fried pork chops covered in gravy!” without even checking with your gut to see what sounds good. If you want deep fried pork chops covered in gravy, that’s fine, but when you’re rebelling against your self-imposed (or spouse-imposed or parent-imposed or Dr. Diet-imposed) rules, you’re not listening to what your body really wants to eat. The Diet Rebel makes your food choices based on what you CAN’T have rather than on what you truly want to have.
What can you do to fight the Diet Rebel? Turn it into the Rebel Ally. Use that loud, strong voice to protect your boundaries. The Rebel Ally will let you say to your sister, “Yes, I can have dessert if I want it,” or, “That meatloaf was delicious, Mom, but I really don’t want a second helping right now,” or, “Sarah, the size of my jeans is none of your business,” or, “Joey, you have no right to comment about my weight.” (pg. 101)
There’s another voice that the authors call the Food Anthropologist. This voice just pays attention and gathers information–WITHOUT JUDGMENT. It’s the voice that says, “I am really hungry today, but I just ate food that would normally fill me up. Oh, that’s right, yesterday I had lighter meals and went for a long hike.” The Food Anthropologist can use a food journal, but you must be careful not to use it as a way to judge or convict yourself of your food transgressions. The Anthropologist’s food journal is merely a collection of facts that can help you sort through your skewed thinking.
When my clients first come to see me, I tell them, “In here it’s a safe place where I expect you to be as kind to yourself as you would be to a friend, a stranger or a lost puppy.” In other words, I expect and hope my clients can use what Intuitive Eating calls the Nurturer. This voice is calm, gentle and kind. It may be new to you. The Nurturer says, “It’s OK to have nachos. Eating nachos is normal.” This voice will say things like, “If I have a cookie it doesn’t mean I’m bad, it also doesn’t mean I can’t lose the weight I want. Cookies are one of my favorite things so I will never cut them out of my diet completely.” The Nurturer is reasonable and patient.
Finally, there is the Intuitive Eater inside of each of us. ”The Intuitive Eater speaks your gut reactions. You were born as an Intuitive Eater, but this persona has probably been suppressed for most of your life by the voices of the Food Police (prevailing in your family and in society), the Diet Rebel, and the Nutrition Informant…it knows how to challenge the distorted messages of the Food Police and how to get the Rebel Ally to speak out loud to fend off the boundary invaders.” (pg. 104) The Intuitive Eater wants to know what you’re hungry for, it tells you it’s OK to leave food on your plate, it makes you understand that it’s normal to eat and enjoy chocolate.
The book suggests some self-talk strategies for challenging the Food Police. In my next post I will discuss some of their ideas and recommendations.
May you be happy, healthy and listen to your gut,
Regan
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